I think if Stephen Harper actually said those words, I would faint (if I hadn't already from the heat!).
Ontario cottage-goers were forced to cancel vacations in Muskoka this month after record-high temperatures sparked massive forest fires in the region.
Dozens of cottages have been destroyed and smoke from the affected regions has engulfed Toronto. Premier Dalton McGuinty declared a state of emergency and warned residents to stay indoors.
Meanwhile, low water levels and unprecedented power demand from air conditioning have forced rolling electricity brownouts across the province, with Ontario’s coal fleet – scheduled for complete shutdown by 2014 – operating at full capacity and making the pollution much worse.
Ontario is in no way alone. Heat and drought have devastated this year’s prairie wheat harvest, causing market prices to double on fears there will be a global wheat shortage.
“What’s happening with the planet’s climate right now needs to be a wake-up call to all of us to take a more energetic approach to countering the global changes to the climate,” Prime Minister Stephen Harper declared during a rare televised speech to the nation.
Now, before you spill your morning coffee or afternoon Bloody Caesar, please note that most of the above “report” is fictional – today, at least. But insert “central Russia” where you read Ontario, “Moscow” where you read “Toronto” and “Russian President Dmitry Medvedev” for Stephen Harper and the story is pretty much bang on.