Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Harper passes legislation to suspend Murphy's law

According to a late-breaking CBC report, the Harper government intends to introduce a bill that suspends Murphy's law.

In Parliament today, Harper said "This old law, introduced by the former Liberal government, is the cause of much misery in the country today. Canada's New Government does not condone such a law, and with our new legislation nothing will go wrong ever again."

Under this new law, none of the following can occur:

  • Bridges collapsing due to lack of municipal infrastructure funding
  • People slipping and falling on ice
  • Hurricanes hitting the Atlantic due to global warming
  • Train derailments and car collisions
  • Melting of the Greenland ice sheet (Denmark has filed a diplomatic objection over Canada's attempt to extend jurisdiction)
  • Airplanes falling from the sky due to security service bungling
  • PMs taking bribes while still in office (or at least the press discovering such bribes)
  • And, of course, no more nuclear accidents are allowed - at all - at any time!

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